


the breakup kind

by avarry



Series: Snapshots [2]
Category: A.C.E (Beat Interactive Band)
Genre: M/M, proposal gone wrong
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-29
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-07-20 05:40:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16130810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avarry/pseuds/avarry
Summary: ["I can’t do this anymore." Sehyoon's voice, when he finally speaks, is soft but it's incredibly loud in the silence.]





	the breakup kind

**Author's Note:**

> i just had an image of jun shopping for an engagement ring after their k-rush episode then finally decided to write this. this is set in the same verse as (in the context that) i belong to you. set about a year after that
> 
> i'm gonna be real honest with you. i really liked it while i was writing it. then i finished it and now i have no idea what i feel about it.

It takes Junhee an inordinate amount of time to pick a ring.    
  
He visits all the jewelry shops in the city, looking at ring upon ring upon ring but doesn't find any. It's not that the rings aren’t beautiful. They are. They all are. But he doesn't find any that speaks of Sehyoon.    
  
Sehyoon who's beautiful and kind and talented and way out of his league. Sehyoon who, just by virtue of existing, makes life better. He's being sappy, Jun knows this. Heck, everyone knows how sappy Jun can be. But that doesn't change the fact that he wants something that says how much he loves and treasures him.    
  
In the end he sees the perfect ring, not at a jewelry shop but at the odds and ends trinket shop across their favorite breakfast cafè. He didn't even plan to enter the shop but he sees an assortment of earrings outside and thought that if he couldn't find a ring, he'd at least get something out off his trip by purchasing a pair of earrings for Sehyoon.    
  
It's hidden in an ornate box, amidst jade rings and gold bangles: a glossy black band with a black square stone set in the middle. It’s not a traditional engagement ring but Jun knows it's the one. He doesn't quite understand it, but it reminds him of Sehyoon, steady, calm, deep.    
  
"You have a good eye," the old woman in the shop tells him when he hands the ring to her.    
  
Jun smiles in reply. "It reminded me of someone."    
  
"Well that someone must be pretty special." Her brows are quirked and Jun feels his cheeks warm. "This is obsidian," she points to the stone in the middle. "It clears the mind,” she tells him as she polishes the ring with a soft black cloth.“Like a light that chases the darkness so we know the path towards love and light."   
  
He isn't versed when it comes to stones but the words of the old woman make his heart flutter, really makes him think of Sehyoon. Sehyoon who doesn't even realize that he's the light that chased away his darkness. He hopes he can be that too, even if just a little bit.   
  
"So, am I right? Is this for someone special?" The woman asks him as she dusts a black velvet box and places the ring in it, here tone teasing.    
  


“Yes. Yes he is.”   
  


  
  
  
The thing is, Jun's been planning this proposal for months now.    
  
On Sehyoon's birthday they'll go to the beach they went to on their first year anniversary and as they walk by the shore, he'll go down on one knee and ask Sehyoon if he'd maybe want to spend the rest of their lives together.    
  
He's already booked everything, talked to the managers of the place, prepared a whole speech and now, he's found the perfect ring. It makes him nervous and excited. The date is still a good month away and so he hides the small blue box in the sock drawer, inside Sehyoon's least favorite sock (the plain dark grey Eunsuh insisted he needed just in case he needs to dress up).    
  
As the date draws nearer, Jun feels his excitement growing. Some days, he would find himself in their bedroom, door closed, staring at the ring on his palm, imagining Sehyoon's gummy smile as he whispers, "Yes." Then, they'd kiss under the starlit sky, the sound of crashing waves their own symphony.    
  
It is just one of those days when Sehyoon calls him from downstairs. Jun's supposed to be finishing his magazine article but so far has not even typed a word.    
  
"Love, come downstairs for a bit." Jun startles, hitting his hand on the open sock drawer making him toss the black ring. He watches it arch into the air before falling on the floor and rolling somewhere underneath the bed.   
  
He curses as he drops to the floor, knees hitting the hard wood.   
  
"In a minute."    
  
"What's that noise? You ok?" Sehyoon's voice draws nearer, feet thudding on the steps. He feels.his pulse quicken. He can’t ruin the surprise now.    
  
Finally, Jun sees the ring underneath the bed, wedged between the wall and Sehyoon's black silk tie. He grabs the ring and hastily shoves it inside his pocket.

 

When the door opens, Jun has already settled himself on the bed, glasses on and fingers poised above the keyboard.

 

When he looks up, he sees Sehyoon in a loose white shirt and his favorite comfy jeans, hair still a bit ruffled, lips pink and chapped. His pulse still hammers against his skin but the sight of Sehyoon calms him even though the ring burns like it’s burning a hole in his pocket.   
  
“When happened? I heard a noise.” There’s worry in Sehyoon’s voice that makes Jun’s heart skip a beat. Sometimes, he still can’t believe Sehyoon cares for him. It feels surreal still and reminders like these are all the more precious, makes his heart swell with happiness. And so he stands up and kisses him, humming his answer between their lips.   
  
"Nothing. Just being a klutz."    
  
When he pulls away, Sehyoon steps close to him and brushes the hair on Jun's forehead. He twines their fingers and leads him downstairs. As they leave the warmth of their bedroom, Jun notices the sock drawer and nudges it close when they pass.    
  
What Sehyoon wants him to see is dinner. There are two takeout boxes from Jun's favorite restaurant downtown. Already, the smell of spicy chicken permeate the air. There's also a bottle of the cheap wine they used to drink in college.    
  
"What's all these?" Usually, it's Jun who prepares dinner or orders takeout so it's unusual for Sehyoon to do this. It's a sweet gesture but it does make him think about what it's all about. He wracks his brain trying to think if he missed any special anniversary or a promotion or anything worthy of such a display but can’t seem to remember any.

 

When he looks at Sehyoon, he stands by the dining table, gaze firmly on the containers. There’s a furrow on his brow that’s only ever present when he’s debating with himself about something. It makes his own brows furrow too. He lets himself take a cautious step and lay a gentle hand on Sehyoon’s shoulder. 

 

“Hey,” he keeps his voice soft. When Sehyoon lifts his head and looks at him, it makes Jun’s stomach twist. There’s something undecipherable in Sehyoon’s eyes. Quickly though, it’s masked beneath a thin veneer of a smile. Sehyoon’s smiles have always been brilliant, his eyes thinning as it follows the curve of his lips. But now, this facsimile of a smile is a just a quirk of the lips that makes Jun feel even more uneasy.    
  
Jun looks at him questioningly but Sehyoon just gestures for him to take a seat. He tries to shake off the unease, tries to be patient, Sehyoon will talk about what’s bothering him when he’s ready. And so he grabs the containers and tucks into the food. It’s delicious. He can taste the spice with every bite. He hasn’t had this chicken in a while because Sehyoon can’t really tolerate spicy food. He chews thoughtfully as he looks at Sehyoon whose gaze is once again far away, chopsticks still untouched. 

 

“This is really good. What’s the occasion?” Jun asks hoping to get his attention and find the reason behind Sehyoon’s distress. But he only gets the same thin smile. 

 

“Are you done with work?” The questions is a blatant change of topic. Jun wants to press but wills himself to let it slide. And so he fills the quiet with stories about the article he’s trying to write and the little office gossip he heard the last time he went to the office. At one point, Jun doesn’t even know what he’s talking about anymore, he’s just glad that his mind can come up with stories on the fly because most of his attention is on Sehyoon. Sehyoon whose eyes have become glassy, lips pursed, fingers splayed on top of the table. Jun doesn’t comment, just reaches out a hand across the table so their fingertips brush.  

 

When he runs out of words and when the food is gone, Jun takes a deep breath and takes Sehyoon’s hand in his, intent on helping Sehyoon with whatever it is that seems to bother him, only for Sehyoon to pull away so quickly it startles him.   
  
"I got you dessert." Sehyoon’s words are rushed, as are his movements when he pushes his chair back and sends it nearly toppling to the floor. He spares the chair a glance before rushing to the kitchen. Jun can only stare at him as he goes. The knot in his stomach tightens and grows.    
  
Sehyoon takes a tub of ice cream and brings it to the table. It’s the expensive kind. The kind Donghun bought for him when he broke up with his first boyfriend all those years ago, the same kind he got Sehyoon when lost his first job. It’s been their go to ice cream during  heartbreaks and so its appearance makes Jun all the more nervous..    
  
"Why do we have a big tub of heartbreak ice cream?” Even to his ears, Jun can hear the tremble in his voice. But Sehyoon doesn't answer. Doesn't even look at him, just grabs Jun's squirtle spoon, the one Sehyoon gave him on their 100th day celebration, and gives to to him. 

 

“Sehyoon what’s going on.?” He doesn’t bother opening the tub of ice cream, just clutches the spoon on his hand, the indentation of the spoon digging into his flesh. His eyes follow Sehyoon as he stands by the kitchen counter, head hung low. Jun's heart beats fast. He can feel something hanging over their head. The tension thick, almost suffocating, stealing your breath, like the moment just before you find yourself underwater.   
  
"I can’t do this anymore." Sehyoon's voice, when he finally speaks, is soft but it's incredibly loud in the silence.

 

“Jun we need to talk.”   
  


Jun’s mind goes into overdrive. He’s heard those words before, from different lips with a different voice but he knows what follows. It plays in crisp color, a movie of the breakup kind. There will be words and tears and aches. Of its own accord, his limbs move with the need to flee. He refuses to stay long enough to find out how this ends. At the back of his mind he knows it’s cowardly, knows he’s being unfair but all sense has left him. Defense mechanism kicking in, escape a beacon calling him. This isn’t real, just another nightmare he needs to wake from. He stumbles on his step, feet unsteady but there are hands that catch him before he completely falls.

 

“Jun.” There’s a quality to Sehyoon’s voice that makes makes him pause. “Jun,” his name whispered just beside his ear. He didn’t see him move, but Sehyoon is right in front him, hands grasping his arms keeping him from falling. 

 

He makes the mistake of looking up and he sees heartbreak clearly painted across Sehyoon’s face, it’s in the glisten of his eyes and the tremble of his lips. 

 

“Jun,” Jun’s breath catch. His mind screams at him to move and so he shrugs Sehyoon off. There is no strength left in him, like a puppet with cut strings, he falls, knees hitting the hard wood floor reminding him of what just happened not even an hour ago. Suddenly he remembers the ring in his pocket. It’s the last straw, he breathes and lets his head fall. There are sobs filling the air. He realizes that it’s him crying when he feels warmth on his cheeks, tears chasing after each other as they fall.

 

Sehyoon’s hand cradles his face and he wants to see but he keeps his eyes shut instead.

 

“Jun.” 

 

“No. Nononononono” he chants it under his breath.

 

“Jun, you have to tell me what’s wrong.”

 

“I don’t want to break up.” The hands cradling his face is gone and he feels the cold that hits his face. Then warmth as Sehyoon’s lips chase his tears, he can feel their softness on his cheeks, on his lips. There are arms encircling him, drawing him closer.  

 

“Please. Just open your eyes.” The words are whispered to his ear, words stringing together in urgency. He takes a deep breath and braces himself, pries his lids open.

 

When he does, he sees that Sehyoon has pulled back a little, hands no longer clasping his arms. His eyes glisten with unshed tears. His voice trembles when he speaks.

 

“Park Junhee I love you so much, so, so much. My love for you is a bottomless pit. Every single day, I’m just astounded at how much more I fall in love with you. I always think this must be it, it’s impossible to fall deeper, but you just prove me wrong. You’re so beautiful and you’re so bright and you’re so good and this might be a selfish request especially since I just made you cry, but if you let me, I’m going to love you more each and every day and I’ll do my damn best to show you just how much.” 

 

For the second time that day, he finds his mind going blank. He hears the words but can’t find it in himself to believe them. Not because he thinks Sehyoon is liar but because he can’t fathom the idea that Sehyoon is basically proposing. 

 

When he looks down, there’s a ring in the middle of Sehyoon’s palm. It’s the same ring he keeps in their jewelry box, the ring his grandmother gave him, the same ring his grandfather wore when he was still alive, a plain gold band with the words  _ all my tomorrows _ engraved inside. 

Sehyoon reaches out the hand not holding the ring, palms brushing tears he didn’t even realize were falling.

 

“So what do you say Park Junhee, will you marry me?”

 

Jun doesn’t answer just lets out a cross between a laugh and a sob. He sounds crazy even to himself but doesn’t try to stop. Sehyoon’s smile just stretches wider, eyes turning crescent. There’s that bright, bright smile and in that moment Jun understands what Sehyoon meant when he said that their was a bottomless pit, it’s impossible to stop falling. Right now, he finds himself falling deeper. And deeper. And deeper.

 

He reaches into his pocket for the engagement ring he bought in that small trinket shop thinking that he wants to try and be Sehyoon’s light, even for just a bit and realizing that he already is. 

 

“Only if you say yes to me too.”

 

* * *

They sit on the couch, feet tangling together, the tub of ice cream between them. Jun’s squirtle spoon dangles from his lips. Sehyoon reaches out and wipes at his lips. Jun smiles but Sehyoon doesn’t return it.

 

“Why did you I think I was gonna break up with you? Was I that bad of a boyfriend?” Jun is surprised at this. At least for a moment. Then he gets it. To Sehyoon it might have looked like he was just waiting for Sehyoon to break up with him. 

He places the empty tub of ice cream and the spoons on the coffee table then plops himself on Sehyoon’s lap. Sehyoon’s hands find his hips and keeps him steady. 

 

“No. No you’re not. I guess I was just really nervous because of the ice cream and the shiftiness and the ‘i can’t do this anymore’ and my went to overdrive. You’re a great boyfriend” He presses a kiss on Sehyoon’s lips. He tastes like vanilla and spicy chicken and cheap wine. 

 

“Well,  fiancé now.” 

 

“But you liked this ice cream.” Even without seeing it, Jun can feel Sehyoon pout and he can’t help but smile wider at that.

 

“I do. But this big of a tub is only for when your trying to comfort someone.” 

 

“I just thought the bigger the better. And I wasn’t shifty, I was nervous.” And he images that happening. Sehyoon would be in the convenience store just three blocks from their apartment, frowning over the selection of ice cream until he sees the biggest tub of vanilla ice cream. It’s an endearing picture and he can’t help but just feel so much love. He pulls a bit back and Sehyoon’s hands tighten on his hips to keep him from falling. He rests his forehead on Sehyoon’s shoulder and breathes in his scent, like the spices from his favorite chicken and the smell of the detergent Sehyoon favors.

 

“I was going to propose to you on your birthday.” He mumbles the words into Sehyoon’s shirt.

 

“I know.” The words are whispered on his ear. “I saw the box in the sock drawer. You’re not as sneaky as you think.” There’s a hint of a laughter in Sehyoon’s voice that makes him chuckle too.

 

“Then why’d you propose today?” He pulls back and looks at Sehyoon. There’s a smile on his lips and sparkle in his eyes.

 

“Well, eight years ago, we went to your family’s place for the weekend. I was driving and it was the wee hours of the morning and I just looked at you and just thought this is what love feels like.” 

 

“I think I knew that day that I was gonna marry you.” He says it matter-of factly, something mundane as oppose to something so heartachingly sweet that Jun can’t help but surge forward and kiss him and kiss him and kiss him and kiss

  
  


* * *

 

"I already booked an engagement special at the resort we went to on our first anniversary. I don't think I can get that refunded." He pulls a loose shirt over his head and changes into his sleeping shorts.

 

Sehyoon just hums from where he's already lying on the bed, blanket thrown away from him. "I've already talked to them,  we can either change it to a wedding or a honeymoon package."

 

**Author's Note:**

> there. thank you for reading!


End file.
